Are You A Gatekeeper? Could You Become a Door Opener?
Do the groups, workplaces, associations or gatherings exclude or invite?
A post-pandemic phenomenon I have been witnessing and pushing up against is gatekeeping. Yes, there have always been gatekeepers in every sector - think about publishing houses, record labels, educational institutions - it's not new. Still, I'm seeing a massive resurgence in the nonprofit sector, the tangental government sector, and the association or group level.
What is Gatekeeping?
Gatekeeping controls access to or limits participation in a particular group, community, or culture. In the context of communities, gatekeeping refers to the actions of individuals or groups who try to define what is and isn't acceptable within a particular community and determine who is and isn't allowed to participate.
What is odd about it is that there is so much talk about transparency, breaking barriers, and being inclusive that it seems counter to what the culture is asking for, but I think I know why it has gained momentum post-pandemic.
We are seeing two things collide:
Groups wanted to find the legitimacy that they lost ground on in the pandemic. To gain this legitimacy, they are working to cultivate who they are working with and how they let people in. The other side is that individuals did a deep dive into who they connect with and spend time with, and they either did a cognizant hard no to people or subconsciously decided they didn't want to play with certain kinds of people.
Now, I'm all about setting up good boundaries, but what are we doing to create cultures of belonging when the groups we are affiliated with are working to exclude us? It has made me think about my work and how I actively, even when it's challenging, am working to create a sense of belonging. I'm asking myself what barriers I'm erecting. Where are we closing the door instead of opening it? These questions can be challenging because, if I'm honest, we don't like everyone, and not everyone is easy to work with or be around. But if we are working to build community, isn't that part of it? How do we learn to work with folks different from us and bump along ok?
Why else do we gatekeep?
We may think we are trying to keep or establish better standards, but we might be squashing trust or not building it in the first place. Building trust is a long-life strategy that strengthens the individual relationships and the communities we are building.
What are you if you aren't a gatekeeper? You are a door opener.
If you look around your organizations and affiliations and everyone looks just like you and does everything just like you, you might have some gatekeepers. Your fear of differences or the unknown might stop you from engaging with new opportunities and different ways of seeing things. What feels safe is boring.
How can you become a door opener?
Talk to people and look for areas of alignment instead of searching for differences.
Reassess your barriers to entry. If you are trying to set guidelines, make them broad enough that more can enter.
Share information wholeheartedly. When inviting people in, keep the goalpost for inclusion the same.
Advocate for more folks to be allowed in rather than pushed out. More might be messy, but some opportunities are yet to be discovered.
Nudge marginalized groups and underrepresented people to play in the sandbox with you. They may need to be invited multiple times. Keep inviting.
Sponsor people who are not like you. Speak their name when they aren't around. Endorse them publicly.
How do we deal with gatekeeping?
I’m a gate pusher, for sure. I think it’s my nature (Enneagram 8), and it’s also how I was nurtured (don’t trust authority) to crash against barriers. Most people I talk with are not inclined to make waves and, instead, will try to do the work or contort themselves to fit in if they want to be part of the group. And if they don’t do that, they just walk away from the group that they thought they wanted to belong to.
If we are trying to build a no-barrier world where access and information are shared, and we include way more than we exclude, how are we doing this in our own lives, and what are our strategies when we run against gatekeepers?
Usually, in these weekly missives, I have answers. This time, I just have questions.
Questions for You
Are there groups that you see developing more gatekeeping?
What is your experience with gatekeeping? How have you handled it?
I'm curious about the sectors you work in if you are experiencing gatekeeping more post-pandemic.
And do you find yourself put in the gatekeeper position, or are you a door opener?
Speaking/Facilitation - Let's talk if you are looking for a speaker on a new look at leadership or facilitation for your nonprofit or group. I'm heading to the "Main Street Now" conference in May to talk about Messy Inclusive Boards and work with a company to develop goal-setting training.
Paintings - I'm working on a series called the Animal Queendom, and you can follow along with the process on my Instagram Stories.
Sharing - I spent the weekend doing a virtual retreat with Upaya Zen Center on the Way of the Haiku. Natalie Goldberg discussed the importance of staying with something for a long time to develop depth. I've been writing Haiku for five years and still feel like a beginner, but I'm developing some depth. What are you loving? Please share it with me.