Can a Post-It Note Bring Back Your Joy?
How one simple daily practice can train your mind to counteract the negativity bias that we are evolutionarily built with, but isn't working in the modern world.
Is every day a win? Does everything go perfectly? Do we get everything done? No. No. No. First, it isn't a game with winners and losers. It's just life. And because it is life, it isn't meant to be what you think is perfect. Because be honest, what you mean by perfect is that everything went your way. Right. Isn't that what you meant? And there is no done. The to-do list of life and work keeps going.
But what happens when we get hooked on the one bad thing that happened, the unsettling conversation, or the comment that seemed off or was downright mean? Does that mean that you had a bad day? Does that define your day?
In too many instances, it probably does.
None of us loves when things go haywire, derail us from our plan, or sour the mood, but that is how most days go. There are good, boring, and things we wish hadn't happened. We are wired to obsess and fixate on what has gone wrong. It's called positive-negative asymmetry; this negativity bias means that we feel the sting of what went wrong more powerfully than the joy of what went right. This is fine when we are problem-solving how to get out of a catastrophe or the ire of a hungry tiger, but it isn't great when a customer is rude, your team didn't get the message, or your partner ate the leftovers that were for dinner for both of you.
We tend to fixate on what didn't go right.
And if we have enough days where it seems like things aren't going right, we tend to get pretty angsty or depressed. LinkedIn tracked their data, and over 80% of the American workforce is looking for another job every week. That's a crazy high statistic, and although many jobs are boring and some workplaces are terrible, I think we are missing a critical aspect of how we care for our peace and sense of joy.
Enter the Post-It Win List.
Write the three things you want to accomplish at the beginning of the day. This Post-It Win List isn't your big, massive to-do list. This is the list that if you accomplish these three things, you will have won in life. These things can be work, personal, or a mix of both.
As you go about your day and do these three things, cross them off.
At the end of the day, look at your three wins and give yourself a gold star or high five, or smile at your sweet self.
Ok. Ok. I know you think this can't be the answer to the dissatisfaction of our lives. And it isn't. If you do this practice for a month, you will start to see your life a little brighter, and maybe that rough conversation isn't the biggest deal. It's a cumulative practice - not a one-and-done.
If you start this practice, I'd love to know. Share your photos of your Post-It's with me and tell me how it's going and, more importantly, if it's working.
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