Observing Broken Meetings
I went to one city meeting and walked away with so many questions. We have to be the change we want to see in the world. Otherwise... yikes.
I recently attended a city meeting where I was asking for funding for an event our organization is doing, and answering any questions and respecting the funding source being present felt essential and mandatory. I had to be there. That's an important qualification to these thoughts.
Like most city meetings, the meeting was long and a little disjointed. This one seemed to lack a lot of understanding on running a city meeting, which caused discomfort to attendees. It felt like most of the people "in charge" weren't sure what they were supposed to do. And it was heated. Did I mention that? A large crowd came to the meeting to defend or speak out against a decision that the commission had made, and both sides were mad.
I wasn't there for that, but I had to sit through it, and I noticed a few things that I think are relevant to the larger picture of our nation.
People want to be heard. And respected. And listened to. And validated. All at once. The issue with public meetings is that they are talking at their elected officials. The meetings aren't set up for dialogue, so that feeling, or those needs, aren't going to be met by the people in charge. Granted, the people who come to talk at the mic are also looking for peer validation, which in our community they get, and that is also what happens in larger government. When someone rallies or attends a meeting, they are posturing for their peers as much as trying to talk to their election or appointed officials.
People want to place blame. I heard comment after comment of "you should, they should..." there was no talk about how the individual could get involved or help. I get it. They are our elected or appointed officials, but if we are going to make effective changes in society, we might get further if we offer to work with them instead of throwing shoulds at people.
Government is entertainment. It may have always been entertainment going back to the Greeks, but it is absolutely entertainment now. I asked a few people why they were there, and they just wanted to see what was going on, and they had nothing better to do, which is wild. I can't imagine wanting to sit in a contentious city meeting as fun, but that is where we are. People watch it online, share it online, attend meetings, and gossip about it at every level. It is entertainment.
People are living at the edge of their fear. You can hear this in the comments that people make. They are afraid on so many levels. Personal, community-wide, global, financial, health, environmental - they are living one step away from panic. It's real. And the mocking or dismissiveness of people in the political sphere doesn't help.
People are angry. Which is probably just fear talking. But, goodness, are they angry. I was chatting with the person next to me, and the person in front of us turned around and told us to shut the fuck up. Yep. Those exact words. He was a 30-something white male talking to a 60+-year-old woman who was as gracious as possible (my friend, not me). His anger was palpable. It was also displaced.
People aren't there. We set up these meetings to be at 6 PM, which is great for some, but not all. If you work in hospitality, you might not be able to get the time off to be there. If you operate a second shift, there is no way you can attend. You won't be there if you have kids in any after-school program. There isn't childcare offered, and that's dinner time for most kids anyway, but we lament that we want "young people" to be there.
People aren't trained. There is a fundamental skill in facilitating a meeting; the folks who volunteer to sit on local commissions do not have that training. It would be a boon to everyone if they were given the opportunity to take training. Well-run meetings make everyone feel welcome, establish ground rules, and set a tone that creates less discomfort.
I was there because I had to be, but I couldn't wait to get out of there. I want people to be engaged because they want to be, but if that was a typical meeting, why would someone choose to be part of local government? And what about the folks that have signed up or are working in government? How might they work to change, enhance, and create a better system? Those are the questions I have, and I'll be delving into them over the next several weeks here.
In the meantime, I have an assignment for you. Go to your city's website and see how many vacancies there are on your city commissions, and email me back or comment here the number. I'm curious, and it will help with future discussions.
As a little extra, I wanted you to know that I've decided that 2024 will be the "Year of the Book." I've been toying with writing a book for years, and in 2024, it will be my big project. I have 15 years of community development work I'd like to extrapolate and make relevant to folks' everyday lives. I just wanted to share what is happening behind the scenes as I start to think about what that looks like. I will need folks to be beta readers; I will be reaching out to interview people and looking for resources for research. I'm excited and hope to take you along on the writing journey.