What day is it? Anyone? Good lord it feels like forever.
Oh, gosh. It seems like forever since we talked. It HAS been forever. So many things have happened and not happened. You might be wondering why I have been so silent. I've been watching so many of my peers (speakers, downtown developers, community organizers, etc.) present themselves as experts in this pandemic age and, frankly, my eyes roll a bit. No one has ever done this before. There are no experts. There are people with good ideas about crisis management, communicating in a crisis, how to be a helper, etc. but there are no experts in how to overcome the financial, emotional, community implications of this current time we find ourselves.
That said... In the 67 days that I have been staying home to keep you and me safe I have struck on some things that you might feel are helpful. If any of this resonates with you let me know. I'm interested in doing some live conversations with people to talk through some of this.
Every decision is the most right decision. People are having to make extremely hard choices. They are reopening business or not reopening. They are going back to work or not going back to work. They are cutting things back financially or freely spending their stimulus checks. They are risking their lives to provide essential services because that is what they are required to do. None of this is "right" or "wrong". It is the most right decision today. Maybe it will be a different decision tomorrow. That's ok. Let's be gentle with ourselves and each other as we see people making choices for their own lives.
You are not personally valued by your busyness. This is a hard one for most people because we live in the age of the hustle. Think way into the future and you are writing your own eulogy... are you going to say that you were busy doing all the things and that is what made you a good, happy, helpful, fulfilled person? Nope. There is a lot of down time right now and the response may be to fill up that time with doing. That will make it better you think. But what you are running away from is your feelings about having a wide open space of time. That feels uncomfortable. It does. Totally. But learning to be uncomfortable in small amounts of open time brings a depth to you that you don't even know yet. It's the secret sauce of meditation. Sitting doing nothing is about learning to be uncomfortable and being ok with it. You have ALL this time to be uncomfortable and can, instead of rushing to be busy, just feel that feeling of being uncomfortable. It will be ok. You are ok. That feeling will pass. I promise. And the more you do it the more you will feel ok with feeling not ok. How amazing would that be? So don't be so quick to fill the time.
We can soften up a bit. It is so easy to judge everyone else. I made the mistake the other day of reading the comments under our governors news briefing on Facebook. Whoo. Everyone could be a better governor than him. Everyone. Your grandma. The guy who changes your tires. The principal at the elementary school. Everyone. If we can learn one thing it might be this, "that's none of my business". I get that the governors ideas, your uncles ideas, the kid you went to high school with are all super interested in you poking at them with how much better you are. Yep. You are the smartest person in the universe. And still we can just think to ourselves that is none of your business. Or, just shut up. Seriously. The judging mind that we all have tends to get watered down in constant judging instead of speaking up about actual important things. Let's not waste our energy in the comments. Let's instead stand up for things that really matter. Your voice DOES matter, but the constant state of criticism you have going on isn't good for you long run - it will become a pattern that you will have a hard time getting out of. I say this as someone working EVERY SINGLE DAY on non-judgement because I don't want to be that mean old critical dried up lady at the grocery store that everyone avoids. SOFTEN UP. Then use your voice for something that matters.
I miss you. I'm back. I just needed a little bit to get my bearings in this weird world. I've been working hard for the small businesses in my community and wrapping my head around what I can offer during this time. I'm booking 15 minute shake up sessions. These are Zoom or Phone Calls to go over one problem in your life or business that you think I could help you see differently. No cost. I have 10 spots open and the first folks that email me back get booked. What's your one thing you want to shake up or shake out? Let's talk about it.
You can find me on Insta in the stories. - XO Jackie